The corona shutdown eliminated our primary source of income, so we have turned to ghost writing to compensate for our shortfall – a natural option for a novelist and a philosophy student. Ghost writers are paid by the word. You receive a short briefing and an expected word count.

Today, Astrid is writing a 3.600 word article on: “How to properly use your television recliner.” For non-writers (writers are already face palming), allow me to provide some perspective on how ludicrous a 3.600 word article on television recliners is.

  • Op-ed pieces in a quality newspaper like the New York Times are a maximum of 1.200 words.
  • A novel is epic when it contains over 110.000 words. Moby Dick, for example, is approximately 206,000 words. Melville liked detail, but even he didn’t dedicate 1,75% of his novel to proper harpoon use.
  • Even philosophers are more on point. On a recent exam I was asked to contrast Rousseau’s natural and normative social contracts in under 1.500 words.

Apparently, television recliner use is infinitely more challenging than I imagined. I ran out of ideas at:

  1. Sit in it.
  2. Don’t spill beer on it.

Astrid is still writing. Can anyone provide additional ideas?

One thought on “What really matters in life

  1. Your post made me giggle. And then scratch my head, because I was ignorant that an item of furniture called “television recliner” even existed (having owned no TV since 1994 I guess I’m out of touch. So I thought you could check out Amazon reviews as part of your research, perhaps? People there might mention other uses that could inspire your writing. Try not to roll your eyes so hard they get stuck in the back of your head.

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